*practice Spanish with Duolingo
*stalk your ex’s current’s instagram, making sure to never double-tap
*shop your ideal size on Anthropologie. Make impulse purchases you can later return and feel like you’ve received free money
*look at old pictures of your child, cry softly
*cry loudly. Roll the windows up, crank the ac. No one will see the tears. Wear sunglasses.
*call your mother and rattle through your grudges. She’s happy to hear them and will offer new ones you hadn’t considered.
*read your book. You’re so far behind your goal.
*knit. But forget to bring your pattern and forge forwards anyways, understanding that you will need to tink back every stitch you make. God, you’re an idiot.
*Take a selfie.
*Delete your selfie. Consider makeup tomorrow.
*smile at your friend mom.
*realize it’s not your friend and maybe make a doctor’s appointment for your facial blindness. It’s time.
*What’s your doctor’s name? How do you make an appointment without talking to anyone?
*Call your mom again.
*Roll your windows up.
*Google window tinting.
*Google your state’s allowances for tinting darkness.
*apologize to Duo and your duolingo partner. You’ll meet your Spanish practice goal tomorrow.
*arrange your peloton workout you’ll definitely do when you get home, or tomorrow.
*maybe consider cleaning up your car.
*wipe SOMETHING. Anything is a step in the right direction.
*why was that sticky?
*do a quick amazon purchase of that weird, goopy car cleaner you saw on TikTok
*is your ex on tiktok? Maybe see if he’s active
*do a fit check
*delete it! Don’t post that!
*It could be funny if you use the right music.
*answer the phone. You’re late picking up your kid.
