Everywhere I look, somebody skinnier than me is talking about their current diets, and I want to go all bulimic all over them. If, you know...I WAS bulimic.
But I'm not.
I just eat. Sometimes I eat too much.
Specifically, I eat too much when I've vowed to myself to start my diet tomorrow.
But like Ms. Joplin once said: Tomorrow never happens.
So, I just eat.
And then I eat some more.
And I don't even enjoy it.
I hate food. Because I love it so much.
It doesn't help to have a boyfriend that's too sweet for my own good. He knows I love food. He's aware of my sweet tooth. So, instead of surprising me with flowers, he surprises me with Airheads and french fries.
And it makes me want to cry.
Because I KNOW all those skinny girls are being surprised with tulips, or lilacs, or even baby's breath.
Sometimes, I visit websites about anorexia and I feel.... jealousy. Sick, right? I wonder if they have pointers.What kind of a person does that?
Maybe I should just go back to hoping I get some kind of awful stomach flu and stop eating because I'm too busy vomiting.
God....that would be so sweet.
